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Gratitude Practice In Sickness and In Health | Week 33

If you want a more lighthearted and positive post, read this. This is one of those posts where practicing gratitude feels like I’m pulling teeth. If I had positive life quotes on my wall, I would be tearing them all down right now, because right now I feel like hell. And for the past few nights while I’ve had trouble breathing, I have thought to myself many times that I would rather die than feel like I’m suffocating. I will take sharp pain over a dull and constant one anytime. In spite of this, I know that I am committed to doing my weekly gratitude practice for at least one full year, and this is when I probably need it the most.

Weekly Gratitude Practice in Sickness and in Health | Week 33.Pin

Admittedly, health is something that I generally take for granted. Being sick for the past week made me realize how fortunate I am to be a healthy, functioning human being most of the year. Granted there are the few times that some form of cold or flu combined with my asthma makes me useless for a couple months every year, but I know many people have far worse conditions. The fact that I can wake up every morning and breath on my own, walk on my own, do most things without inhibition is a huge blessing.

When reflecting on gratitude, I am first reminded of three people. 1. My grandma. I don’t know how she puts up with all the crap that comes with old age and still manages to have a smile on her face. 2. My mom who has been sick with the same pneumonia as me still goes to work everyday without a single complaint. 3. My second mom. I’ve come to know her after her car accident that paralyzed her from the waist down. I remember her saying how it would be a dream to walk or run again, but this has never stopped her from living her life.

I am often inspired by all these women and the manner in which they live their lives. Maybe one day, I will mature enough and gracefully accept the curve balls life throws my way, but right now I am hating my life. Meanwhile, I hope these weekly gratitude practices will teach me how to appreciate what I have now and live life to the fullest.

BTW, I finally caved and went to the doctor to get a steroid shot and some antibiotics. I hope to be on the way to good health again!

What I am looking forward to and am grateful for when I am my healthy self:

  • Walking around the neighborhood to soak up the sun.
  • Going to the hot tub without worrying about how the drastic temperature changes will affect my health.
  • The ability to exercise. Yes, it feels like a chore sometimes, but it’s an ability not everyone has!
  • Being able to think outside of my self and finally take care of our cats, our plants, maybe even Jacob? :P
  • Being able to leave the house to do normal things like go to the grocery or hang out with friends.
  • Hiking! We have so many hikes to go on before the summer comes… I hope we can get to them all.
  • Dating again. It’s been put on hold for the meantime, but I am so ready to date again!

But while I’ve been sick, I am grateful for:

  • Jacob has been making me hot water every few hours and doing all sorts of grocery runs for me.
  • My friends have been checking up on me to see how I’m doing.
  • My family and church have been constantly keeping me in their prayers.
  • Long, hot showers that clear out my airways.
  • Tea. I have been drinking tons of numi, chukar cherries, and korean barley tea. Any tea you’d recommend?
  • Sweet Oranges. I’m trying to boost my immune system so I have been eating tons of them.
  • Finally got my appetite back! Though it’s only for unhealthy food, it’s better than not eating. :)

How has your week been going? Hopefully a lot better than mine!

This is my gratitude practice for week 33 . 19 more weeks to go! Click the banner below to see my previous gratitude posts:
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This Post Has 24 Comments

  1. Hsiao-Ting

    Awww Esther. I’m sorry to hear you’re sick again :( I didn’t know it was this bad. Sorry I haven’t been in touch since I was out of the country. I hope you’re feeling better! I know being sick sucks :( I love you and am praying that you have a speedy recovery!

    1. esther julee

      Thanks girl. I’m getting much better now! You just worry about feeling better yourself! I’m surprised that dole whip didn’t set me back.. kinda expected to get worse after that.. but I think I’m finally on the way to recovering yay! :)

      1. Hsiao-Ting

        Yeah David’s mom is here cooking up a storm. She can only stay for the day since she has to go back and teach Sunday school tomorrow but she won’t let me do anything. She said I shouldn’t do anything aka leave the house for at least two weeks. I’m glad you’re recovering though!! :) Makes me happy :)

  2. Britt @ One&20

    You have such a phenomenal attitude. You really inspire me! :)
    Feel better.

    1. esther julee

      Thank you! :) I’m glad you think so when I don’t. :P For real tho.. you guys all inspire me. I feel like a lot of people in the blogging community have been striving for a more positive lifestyle so it’s been rubbing off on me too.

  3. Amy

    <3 feel better friend…and i think it just shows how awesome your character is that even when you're feeling a little crummy you're looking for ways to be gracious.

    1. esther julee

      Thank you!! I am seriously trying.. I cannot say I feel gracious, but I’m trying. :)

    1. esther julee

      Carol has one just like it. We bought it at the asian grocery store!! :) They aren’t super expensive. I wish they sold them on amazon.. or I knew how to search for it. I tried “glass tea pot at asian stores” lol


  4. I hope you feel better soon Esther! The cherry blossom green tea sounds interesting! I usually do Holy Basil tea when I’m under-the-weather, it is suppose to be healing. When you are sick you are suppose to be focused on yourself and making sure you are getting whatever you need to get better. I think you did a great job in finding your gratitude for the week.

    1. esther julee

      Thank you for the encouragement! I think I just need a variety of teas. I will have to look up the Holy Basil. Where can you get it? Amazon? I think they sell everything there, right? If I keep drinking the same kind or eating the same thing, I get so sick of it easily. I think that’s why I like to try all sorts of beers too. Booo. Can’t be drinking beers while sick.

        1. esther julee

          I’ll have to check out whole foods in our area then. I’ll try a smaller box first before committing to the six boxes. haha I tried drinking beer last weekend because I was thinking alcohol is a great cough suppressant right? i was wrong… AGAIN. i never learn my lesson.

  5. Melinda DiOrio

    I hope you feel better soon Esther! It sounds like, as usual, you are still keeping up your positive spirit! I always enjoy reading your Gratitude posts!

    1. esther julee

      Thanks Melinda. Hope you got my email reply back to you! I wish I felt positive at the moment. Even if I don’t feel grateful, I’m trying to make the choice to be. Baby steps, right?

      1. Melinda DiOrio

        Well it seems like you’re doing a pretty good job of being grateful to me! And yes, I got your email. Thank you so much for the very quick reply!

  6. Esther, I totally agree with Erika! And I also have the WORST time being grateful when I’m sick (or stressed/frustrated/etc.). Thinking about those around you who seem to embody gratitude seems like a great antidote to pretty much everything!

    1. esther julee

      I’m glad you guys understand how I feel. I will say it can go either of the two ways. Sometimes I feel like I can never live up to those standards and it becomes discouraging while other times I can draw inspiration from their lives. :) So glad it happens to be the latter this time! <3

  7. Erika

    Esther — even though you feel like this wasn’t positive, I think it was! Sometimes that struggle for optimism or focusing on the positive things is when positivity is its most powerful!

    But I also appreciate you telling it like it is. Saying, “hey, I think my life kind of sucks right now.” I think that acceptance alongside the practice of gratitude is what makes it powerful. It isn’t sugarcoating, but it’s refocusing the attention of the good (after acknowledging what’s bothering you).

    I have also learned that negative events/struggles often point to where we need to grow or do things differently. Even if something was good for us in the past or we were super grateful without having to think about it, we may be in a season of growth.

    Maybe this time with your health being poorer is serving as an arrow to change. And that change may be different than you think… maybe it’s not just about taking care of yourself physically, but in other ways, too. How much do you push without other people’s help — and is that helpful to you and your spirit? Do you take on too much sometimes to the detriment of yourself? Do you allow yourself to rest, be cared for, and to be still? Maybe the season of sickness has its own lessons.

    I totally hope this didn’t come off as presumptuous or anything at all! Just kind of typing my thoughts as I go… and of course, reflecting and relating to this hardcore. :) I hope you feel well soon! And way to go, pushing through with your gratitude practice!

    1. esther julee

      I agree with you. I feel the same way about love too. I think love counts way more when you choose to do it in the hardest times. When it comes easy, it’s still good, but you just don’t know the capacity when it’s not tested. I guess it’s the same with gratitude.

      I also agree that gratitude without acknowledging how hard life can sometimes be false or a coping mechanism to not accepting the reality of the situation. I think it’s good to be realistic, but still make the choice to stay grateful in sucky situations. I feel like I’ve seen you do that a lot in your writing! And I’m definitely inspired by all your posts on gratitude. :) Even though you may not be doing them as much anymore.. the ones that you wrote still carry a lot of weight.

      I do not allow myself to be still or rest. As we speak I am out in LA and not in bed at home like I should be. haha I think I am just hoping that my body is stronger and that it can take it! And definitely not presumptuous at all. I feel like you get me. haha

  8. Destiny Barker

    Try puttin some vinegar and honey in your tea. That’s been my grandmother’s remedy for every illness for as long as any of us can remember. And it works! I hope you feel better soon!

    1. esther julee

      I should try that! Can you taste the vinegar? I’ve been trying everybody’s remedies. I even ate some raw garlic. That one was not fun. haha Thanks so much!

      1. Destiny Barker

        You can taste the vinegar a little bit but it’s not as bad as you’d think. I can’t imagine raw garlic! Did it at least make you feel better?

        1. esther julee

          It definitely cleared up my sinuses. That stuff is spicy raw! I had no idea how spicy it was!!

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